Here is a great Father’s Day story, yet not about my Dad. This story is about my first experience in buying a car with Ken & Kevin Spainhour. I’ve known the Spainhour family for almost 25 years now and love them dearly. Ken & Diane have been like pseudo-parents, caring for me in so many different ways, including driving up to NY for my wedding, and my Dad’s funeral services. Just wonderful people! Here is just one of the many stories of how they cared for me like their own son. Enjoy!
It was the summer after my sophomore year at Guilford College in North Carolina. I was so excited as I had the opportunity to buy my very first car. I had saved up $8000 and I was ready. I had learned how to drive stick and wanted a five-speed. I was staying in North Carolina for the summer to work at basketball camps and spend time with the Spainhours (my adopted North Carolina family). They are great people who showed me the ways of the south including country music, southern cooking, and most importantly southern hospitality and love.
We were in the thriving metropolis of King, North Carolina. My college roommate Kevin and his Dad we’re going to take me to the local car place. On the lot in prime condition, there was a stick shift Chevy Cavalier Z24 . Gray with pinstripes. It was love at first sight. The sticker price was $7600, so I thought to myself great I can have $400 leftover and I can get the vehicle that I wanted. We took it for a spin that evening and I can still remember the rev of the engine, the digital dashboard, the moonroof, and just the feel of the car. I loved it! I was ready to buy it. Kevin gently touched my arm and politely told me with some southern charm to keep my mouth shut. We came back to the lot and Ken (Kevin’s Dad) starts chit-chatting with the owner of the car place. They were not even talking about the car, just chatting. I was bouncing on my tippy toes ready to just blurt out I’ll take it! Kevin just nodded and again told me to keep quiet. So Ken finally wraps up his conversation after what feels like forever and said, “Well Andrew here is interested in the car so we will be back tomorrow” and off we went.

Now, I’m thinking what? Why didn’t we take it? Why didn’t we drive it off the lot? A little disappointed we went back to their house and discussed the car. Ken told me that the car looked like it was in good shape and would be a good purchase.We returned to the lot the next morning after a proper southern breakfast of biscuits, gravy, eggs, sausage and one of Kevin‘s mothers favorite concoctions that they called mickies, (a mixture of peanut butter, oatmeal, and chocolate dried on wax paper). Delicious! At the lot, the car shined brilliantly and was parked in a prime spot. Again Kevin tells me to be quiet. Ken again began talking with the owner and just went ahead and put it out there: Andrew here has $6000 to spend and would like to purchase this vee-hi-cal. (strong accentuation on the ‘vee’ with the southern accent) $6000! I scream to myself that $1600 off the sticker price there’s no way he’ll go for that? The owner pauses, scratches his chin for a moment looks at Ken, looks at me, and says “Let me write up the paperwork.” We were out of there in 15 minutes and I was driving my first ever car. I felt free, exhilarated, thankful to Mr. Spainhour and his family, and had an extra $2000 in my pocket, instead of only $400. |
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Moral of the story: As school leaders, as educators, and as parents, we have to keep our calm cool and collective-ness. We have to make big decisions often, and it’s important to remain calm. It’s also important to draw on your relationships. Ken clearly knew this gentleman and had a professional relationship with him. It was the trust & the relationship that drove the conversation. Ken didn’t even have to haggle. There was no back-and-forth, no yelling, no let me go into the back room that we’ve come to associate with car salesmen. Ken was like a Jedi with his mind tricks from Star Wars: “these are not the droids you’re looking for”. Ken is a man of principle, kindness, authenticity, and graceI take this story with me and refer to it often in a variety of situations: keep calm, be authentic, be assertive, and do the best you can for your family, friends, school district, or place of work. Thank you to the Spainhour for the very many memories, meals, road trips and of course, the love you have shown me throughout the years… Love you all! Keep rolling everyone! Quote of the day: “Always focus on the front windshield and not the rearview mirror” – Colin Powell |
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