Meet Salvatore Manzi, the author of Clear and Compelling. Salvatore & I hit it off immediately on the podcast. I mean, with a name like that!!!! In all seriousness, he shared many great tips and guidance for speaking–for extroverts & introverts.
Rooted in curiosity, shaped by life across seven countries, Salvatore helps bold thinkers become bold leaders. He helps leaders communicate clearly, lead with authenticity, and navigate complexity with confidence. With over 20 years of experience, he brings a unique blend of strategic insight, real-world leadership, and human-centered communication to every engagement. I am grateful for his guest blog today.
You can watch our podcast here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0VgbNLQ_BI&t=13s
You can learn more about Salvatore here: https://www.salvatoremanzi.com/
Guest Blog: Salvatore Manzi
BIO: Salvatore Manzi is a leadership communications coach who helps leaders amplify engagement and impact. His book, Clear and Compelling, just released, combines research in neuroscience, psychology, and organizational behavior with years of coaching to deliver practical strategies for turning insights into influence. https://linktr.ee/meetsalvatore
When Your Brain Hits Pause
With a lot of joy, I was on Andrew’s podcast recently and coasted through the big questions like a proud hiker cruising along a familiar ridge. Then we reached the rapid-fire portion, and the trail suddenly tilted. Andrew tossed me a softball. “Favorite book you read lately?” My brain answered with a puff of static.
Truth is, I read five to ten books every month. My phone storage has more books than music. Yet in that moment, nothing surfaced.
Neuroscience describes this sensory stress as amygdala hijack, when we experience fight, flight, or freeze. In a freeze moment, accessing the prefrontal cortex becomes difficult. All your thoughtful ideas, your clever stories, and your neatly prepared talking points are suddenly behind a curtain. It is fast, automatic, and human! I teach this material for a living and I still experience it.
The key is remembering that a hijack is normal, and you can use mental and physical techniques to address it.
A Simple Workaround The Brain Appreciates
When the mind locks up, start by naming it. Neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett writes that naming an emotion creates a measurable shift in brain activity. It turns a lightning strike into something you can hold and navigate.
Once named, redirect attention. Aim for something physical. Counting your breath. Feeling the weight of your feet on the ground. Imagining the air moving low in the ribs. These steps do not solve the freeze. They create enough internal space for clarity to return.
But here is the part that matters most in real conversations. You often need to buy a few seconds. In a boardroom, classroom, or podcast hot seat, that pause can feel like a century. Buying time is a practical communication skill and a sign of self-regulation.
Ask for clarification.
“Can you say that one more time so I can give you a thoughtful answer?”
Turn the question back to them.
“What is your favorite book right now?”
Even a small redirect brings the prefrontal cortex back online because it shifts attention away from the trigger and places you inside a familiar interaction. The nervous system steadies. Access to language returns. You remember your own brilliance.
The Wedding Toast Trick
Think about wedding toasts. If someone is not used to speaking in front of a lively, love-filled crowd, the freeze can hit right at the moment the mic is handed over. One workaround is classic for a reason. You stand up. You smile. You say hello. Then you turn everyone’s eyes where the moment wants to go.
“Is the wedding couple beautiful or what?” Lift glass.
The room cheers. That gives you a pocket of time. While they look at the couple, you get to breathe, settle, remember your toast, and walk yourself back into coherence.
That is all we are doing in any high-pressure conversation. Buying a pocket of time so the brain can shift from reactive circuitry to reflective circuitry. The moment remains human. The message lands.
What To Do The Next Time You Freeze
Here is a short trail map you can keep with you.
- Notice the feeling. Name it quietly. Fear, blankness, overwhelm. Naming it lowers intensity.
- Shift attention to the body. Breath count, feet grounding, belly softening.
- Buy time. Ask for clarity. Give a quick compliment. Turn the question back.
- Reenter with simplicity. One line. One step. The next idea follows.
Every leader, educator, coach, and speaker deals with these moments. I deal with them. The trick is not pretending it isn’t happening. The trick is recovering with skill and generosity.
A Closing Invitation
The next time your brain hits pause at exactly the wrong moment, try the wedding-toast move. Redirect attention, breathe once, buy a little time, and walk yourself back into the conversation. Your best insights are still there. They simply need a few seconds to return.
If you want to become more skillful with these moments, start practicing a ten-second reset before every meeting or interaction this week. Let your nervous system learn the pathway back to presence.
Let me know how it goes.
